A good talk about male survivor resources

Allan emailed me a video of Rick Goodwin’s talk about male victims of sexual abuse and building the Men’s Project. It is worth viewing. It gives an insight into the things abused men and their advocates face when trying to create services for them.

Stop the Abuse: The Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests

Often times people want to help others but do not know how. This cannot be any truer than when it comes to helping abused men and boys. The resources sometimes are not apparent and are often difficult to find. Sometimes the resources are hidden or even barred by other groups who wish to polarize the issue. The intent here is to provide those who wish to help male victims with the opportunity to do so. Every month I will post a new link to an organization that provides services for male victims. As the list grows, I will create a page where all the links can be found.

Please remember that you do no have to empty your wallets to help. Even a small donation can go a long way. And for those on the other side of the issue, it would go a long way to demonstrating real concern for all victims if you donated as well.

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SNAP

Welcome Statement:

If you’ve been victimized by clergy, please know that you are not alone. You can get better. You can reach out to others who’ve been hurt just like you have. Together, we can heal one another.

We are SNAP, the Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests.
We are the nation’s largest, oldest and most active support group for women and men wounded by religious authority figures (priests, ministers, bishops, deacons, nuns, brothers, monks, and others). We are an independent and confidential organization, with no connections with the church or church officials. And we are here to help.

SNAP was founded by Chicago’s Barbara Blaine in 1989. Since then, SNAP has helped thousands of survivors. We offer support in person, (via monthly self-help group meetings in chapters across the country), over the phone, on line, and at twice-a-year national meetings.

We also provide a safe and productive outlet for the passion many survivors feel toward preventing future abuse.

Our web site exists to provide support and knowledge to all victims of clergy abuse, to help educate the public, and to help ensure that in future generations, children will be safe.

Welcome! Reach out! Get help!

Please donate and help make a difference.

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Child sex abuse royal commission hears paedophile Marist brother dressed students up before abusing them — A NOTORIOUS paedophile Marist brother made one boy dress up in women’s clothing and then kiss him, the child sex abuse royal commission has been told today. The 65-year-old man said he still found it difficult to talk about it even 53 years later. He said that Brother Kostka Chute, then aged about 26, had told him there was going to be a school play at the Marcellin school in Randwick.

Domestic violence: male victim tells of wife’s abuse — Eric was insulted, spat on and slapped in front of his children, but he did not want them to think he was breaking up with their mother. “Fear of losing custody of my children, fear that I would be perceived as the perpetrator, fear that things could get worse and uncertainty of finding shelter kept me from taking action,” he told The Sunday Times of Malta.

Feminism Is Directly Responsible For The Rise of Men’s Right’s Groups — The recent rise of men’s right’s activist groups is due to two primary reasons. 1) Men are responding to some of the double standards and biases introduced in some feminist philosophy. 2) Men have realized the need to increase advocacy and awareness of issues primarily affecting the male gender just as feminism has done the same for the female gender. Unfortunately, the rise of men’s advocacy groups has been met with an onslaught of bashing, shaming and name-calling from feminist groups. Continue reading

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Another Maltese reports beating for reporting abuse in Australian institutions — A Royal Commission in Australia has heard more shocking evidence by Maltese men about the abuse they suffered from Christian brothers when they were orphan boys. The commission, meeting in Perth, is investigating institutional responses to child sexual abuse. The West Australian newspaper said hundreds of boys at the Bindoon, Tardun and Castledare institutions were beaten by day and raped by night.

Doubling up in prisons ‘creating culture of sex abuse’, warns former Mountjoy governor — THE ‘doubling up’ of inmates in single prison cells is perpetuating a culture of sexual abuse where prisoners are raping their cellmates, former governor of Mountjoy Prison John Lonergan told the Sunday Independent. Mr Lonergan spoke out just days after Justice Minister Alan Shatter apologised to the family of Gary Douch, a vulnerable prisoner who was beaten to death while packed into a holding cell with a mentally disturbed prisoner with a history of violence.

Lee Suckling: Lifting the lid on sexual abuse in the gay community — Just before Christmas 2010, I nabbed a media invite to the launch party of ParliOUT, the UK’s first support group for LGBT people working in Parliament. Bottles popped and Westminster’s gay elite celebrated the workplace equality network that allowed the 22 gay MPs and dozens of other staffers to make themselves more visible within parliamentary walls. Continue reading

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Autistic Md. boy says he wants to resume relationship with girls accused of assault — He grew frightened when his schoolmate put the knife to his throat, while his 15-year-old girlfriend shot video with her cellphone. “I thought she was going to cut me. I was like, ‘Please stop,’ ” said the 16-year-old autistic boy, whose alleged abuse by two girls from his Southern Maryland high school made headlines around the world.

FBI reveals teacher abused up to 90 boys — Harrowing details of the abuse carried out on young boys by a former teacher at a London private school were revealed yesterday in a document released by United States authorities, as distraught parents waited to discover whether their children were involved. William Vahey, 64, a convicted paedophile, was able to drug and abuse up to 60 boys aged between 12 and 14 at London’s Southbank International School (SIS).

Jury recommends 15 years in prison for former priest in sex abuse case — A jury sentenced former priest James Schook to 15 years behind bars for sexually abusing two boys while he worked for the Louisville archdiocese in the 1970s. After years of delays and a three-day trial, Schook’s victims heard his fate Thursday. The former priest will face nine years for an indecency charge and six years for three sodomy charges for a total of 15 years.  Continue reading

The Code of Silence

Originally posed on May 21, 2013

Over the last week, sexual violence in the military received much media attention. This partly came out of two people in charge of handling sexual assault investigations facing their own charges of sexual assault. It also came from President Obama speaking about the issue during a press conference.

Yet one aspect of this scandal remains unspoken: men make up the majority of the victims. Look at the coverage of this topic, and one sees numerous discussions about protecting women, but little mention of protecting men. One hears from women who survived assaults, but not from men. Yes, occasionally someone will remember that “men can be victims too.” Yet that afterthought does not linger long, and soon the conversation goes back to women.

This is not to say that women do not face legitimate risks. It is absurd to think that servicewomen in the field will refrain from eating and drinking at night so they will not need to use the latrine and risk assault. Yet it is equally absurd to think that the majority of the victims of these assaults would go unmentioned because they are male.

Nevertheless:

More military men than women are sexually abused in the ranks each year, a Pentagon survey shows, highlighting the underreporting of male-on-male assaults.

When the Defense Department released the results of its anonymous sexual abuse survey this month and concluded that 26,000 service members were victims in fiscal 2012, which ended Sept. 30, an automatic assumption was that most were women. But roughly 14,000 of the victims were male and 12,000 female, according to a scientific survey sample produced by the Pentagon.

The statistics show that, as Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel begins a campaign to stamp out “unwanted sexual contact,” there are two sets of victims that must be addressed.

“It appears that the DOD has serious problems with male-on-male sexual assaults that men are not reporting and the Pentagon doesn’t want to talk about,” Elaine Donnelly, who heads the Center for Military Readiness.

Continue reading

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Athens event aims to raise awareness of male childhood sexual abuse — To help spread awareness about childhood sexual abuse suffered by men, The Cottage Sexual Assault and Children’s Advocacy Center will host its inaugural 1BlueString event Friday at Nuci’s Space. During the awareness event, guests will here acoustic sets from local musicians and guitarists who have switched out the low E string on their guitars with a blue string as a show of solidarity with the victims.

Barbara Kay: ‘Rape culture’ fanatics don’t know what a culture is — In today’s edition of the Post, there is a very thoughtful and serious discussion of whether the phenomena of “rape culture” even exists. It will no doubt receive the usual stream of invective — accusations of trivializing rape, denying that sexual assaults occur, implying that women who drank too much deserved to be raped. Hardly real criticisms in any intellectual sense, but they will come.

College Men Aren’t Closet Rapists — I don’t know which talking point from this administration is more insulting: the myth that discrimination keeps women from achieving parity with men, or the claim that male rapists lurk on every campus corner waiting to pounce on innocent, unsuspecting young women. The latter assertion is particularly dangerous. Not only does it lack substance, it serves to broaden the chasm that already exists between women and men. Continue reading