Originally posted on April 9, 2013
“Sexual assault, you say? Lucky guy others say, nudge-nudge, a fivesome and didn’t even have to pay for it.”
Rosie DiManno of The Star wrote that in response to a recent gang rape of a young man. According to reports, four women offered a 19-year-old young man a ride home after they left a club. The women, reportedly all in their 30s, instead took turns sexually assaulting the young man in a parking lot. They then drove off in a Honda SUV.
That is a fairly straightforward report. Here is how DiManno put it:
They could be sex molls or sex maulers.
Definitely on the chubby side, though: described as around 190 to 200 pounds and five-foot-four.
Last seen teetering around in high heels and short black dresses — typical clubbing attire — their estimated age 30 to 36, so not cougars on the prowl.
A quartet of ladies, wanted in connection with the sexual assault of a 19-year-old male.
What the women are alleged to have done to this young man is unclear and won’t be clarified unless, perhaps, the incident ever comes to trial. The victim has declined to be interviewed, in a Star request relayed by Toronto police.
Yet again we’re confronted by a purported crime of sexual violation couched in unhelpful language because the Criminal Code no longer includes those details, won’t even draw a distinction between a grope and rape. Sexual assault is defined as “not limited’’ to kissing, grabbing, oral sex and penetration.
A news release issued by police doesn’t specify whether this event would be classified as sexual assault 1, 2, or 3, which is the spectrum range for severity. It sounds like sexual assault 1, however, because there was no weapon used and the victim does not appear to have suffered significant bodily harm.
Of course, one man’s sexual assault is another man’s sexual fantasy come true.
DiManno states that “sexual assault is no laughing matter” and that she is “writing this column with a straight face”, yet that is hard to believe when she writes things like:
These clubbing vamps are a bizarre anomaly, pack hunters in their getaway SUV — Thelma and Louise and Tiffany and Debi, four white chicks who may have gang-groped or otherwise molested a teenager because they didn’t have the balls to pick on, or pick up, a man their own age.
Wanted: Bad girls in black minidresses and stilettos, approach with caution.
This report stands in impressive contrast to how gang rapes against women are reported and treated in the media. One does not see this level of tongue-in-cheek humor over the assault of a woman or girl. It is unlikely that any news organization would run something like this about a female victim.
DiManno has a point that the other article about the case does not specify the nature of the charges. That can allow anyone to speculate about what happened, although it seems unlikely that four women would kidnap someone just to take turns groping him. This is likely a case of forced intercourse, commonly known as rape.
The bigger issue is that DiManno falls back on the old “all men want sex” trope in order to mock this young man for reporting the assault. She implies that people should suspect the veracity of the young man’s claim because he did not report the assault immediately.
Perhaps the reason he waited to report the assault is because he did not think anyone would believe him.
It is sickening to see a columnist mocking an abuse victim while claiming not to treat sexual violence as a joke. This kind of thing is precisely why so many male survivors remain silent. When this is the kind of response you will get, one can understand why some men and boys would want to avoid it.