This is why we can’t have nice things

One of the common mantras used by the far left is that we as a society “need” something. This thing typically is not an actual necessity. It is never food, water, air, clothing, education, or the like. It is usually something trivial and pertains to the progressive ideology. For example, take Bustle’s recent article titled Why Being A Geek Also Means Being A Feminist, Because Why Should Guys Have All The Fun?

Shaun Fitzpatrick regales readers with her insights about the importance of feminism in the geek community. One knows it will be a rather pedantic escapade when an article begins with:

As I write this, I am currently wearing a button down, a pair of suspenders, and have a bow-tie and fez in my backpack (I’m waiting to get out of work and dress up for a Doctor Who exhibit at a local spot). I feel a little bit like Clark Kent, hiding my nerdy superpowers from an office full of unsuspecting co-workers. Not that I’m really that interested in hiding. I am a geek, a fangirl, a card carrying, feels-having, obsessive devotee toward a select group of shows, movies, and books that have captured my heart and imagination and make me incapable of shutting up if someone mentions them in my presence.

But I’m also a pretty outspoken feminist, which at times can seem like a conundrum.

It is a conundrum, although not for the reason Fitzpatrick thinks. The issue is the “but” in her sentence. The word “but” is a term of negation. It implies that the clause preceding it is untrue in part or in whole. By stating that she is a geek, but also a feminist, Fitzpatrick implies that being a geek is anathema to being a feminist. I would agree. The two do not go well together. Fitzpatrick explains why:

The geek community sometimes has an uneasy relationship with its female members. Our street cred is challenged more than our male counterparts, we’re accused of just looking for attention or not being “real fans,” and we can even been sexually or verbally harassed as women in what many think to be a boys’ club.

Fitzpatrick provides no evidence to support these claims. They are, however, very common claims made by feminist women. I rarely see non-feminist women claiming that they were excluded because they are female. The language Fitzpatrick uses reveals the real issue.

Anytime a community is predominantly male, feminists accuse that community of keeping women out. Never mind that there is a notable trope about how male geeks attempt to get women, particularly their girlfriends, interested in their hobby. The notion that geeks would try to keep women out when the majority of geeks are heterosexual males makes little sense.

However, let us entertain this notion. Why would geeks be so against having women, particularly feminist women, in their community? Could it be this:

We’re occasionally (or, sadly, not so occasionally) made to feel uncomfortable about expressing our love for all things nerdy, and an apparent lack of a safe space within the community can turn a lot of would-be fangirls off. And that means fewer Harry/Draco slash fanfic and Han Solo memes, which I am just not OK with.

Could the turn-off factor not be that gross sense of entitlement? The geek community is already a safe space. It exists primarily because geeks were and continued to be bullied for their interests. These spaces allow them to socialize with others who share those interests without the fear of rejection or violence. Why then would they need to create another safe space?

Fitzpatrick’s comment reveals the real issue feminists have with the geek community: it is not built for them. Of course, this cannot stand. Feminists endeavor to take over the community by making it more “feminist”:

The Fangirl’s Guide to the Galaxy makes a pretty convincing case that, besides being awesome, fangirls are also bringing a heavy dose of feminism into the geek community. Sure, we still have a ton of female characters running around in tiny skirts and trying (and failing) to keep their double-Ds under control in their Spandex bodysuits. But we also have badasses like Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Kamala Khan who are kicking the patriarchy’s butt. Slowly but surely, we’re starting to take over.

That is going over very well. Even feminists complain about the lack of creativity and boring stories and characters that result from the feminist “take over.” It would be one thing if feminists brought the talent of someone like Hayao Miyazaki. Instead, they bring whatever it is that G. Willow Wilson does. If this is “kicking the patriarchy’s butt” either its butt is really soft or feminists are not kicking hard enough.

Let us look at the ways feminists are “taking over.”

Because There Are a Ton Of Strong Women In the Geek Community

We tend to think of comic book stores, conventions, and the gaming universe as being overwhelmingly male and not particularly female-friendly. Pop culture has done a lot to push this idea; just think of the Big Bang Theory guys who hide behind their comic books and hyperventilate when they have to talk to women.

No, pop culture did not do that. Feminists like Fitzpatrick did. When one looks up articles about women in the geek community, most of the negative commentary comes from feminists. It is not men saying “Women get out!” It is feminists saying “Women aren’t welcome here!” Their “proof” is usually the negative reaction geeks have to feminism, which is akin to saying someone is anti-black because they do not like hip hop.

But the geek universe actually has a ton of women in it! Maggs points out that, statistically, the gaming community is 36 percent women ages 18 and up, and more than half of all social media discussions during San Diego Comic Con were started by women.

This is a strange straw man. The point of the argument is to assert that women make up half the community, yet by their own unsourced estimation feminists acknowledge most geeks are male.

But even without seeing the numbers, it’s not hard to believe that geeky ladies are everywhere. Think of your own friends. How many want to solve mysteries with Sherlock, or are hardcore (or not so hardcore) about their favorite games, or get all the feels when you mention Harry Potter? These are geek girls, and we’ve got an incredible, supportive community among each other!

This is easily one of the laziest appeal to the people I ever read.

Because the Geek Community Has Some Totally Kickass Female Role Models, Both Real…

Maggs interviews some of your favorite famous geeky ladies, like Erin Morgenstern and Jamie Broadnax, and asks them why they identify themselves as a fangirl.

It would help this argument if Fitzpatrick used more well-known women.

…And Imaginary

Not all of our fangirl role models have to be real, of course. Half the fun of being a fangirl is knowing all about some awesome female characters! Maggs mentions a couple badass ladies from a number of geeky genres (movies, games, anime, etc) to expose readers to new imaginary role models. Although my personal favorite isn’t on the list (where is River Song?!), characters like Aveline from Assasin’s Creed III and Xena have a ton of fan and feminist street cred. Seriously, introduce your best friend/sister/younger female family member to these women so you can empower each other and fangirl out together!

No, I think they deserve better female characters than those. I would sooner introduce them to Tsunade, Rukia, Izumi, or Nausicaa.

Yet that is a secondary issue. The issue here is what does any of this have to do with “empowering” each other? Is this not supposed to be about storytelling? Every story is not about empowerment, and certainly not about appealing to the female ego. This sentiment is precisely why feminist fiction fails and becomes a boring mess of masturbatory drivel.

Because Our Collective Geek Identity Is Stronger Than the “Fake Geek Girl”

That Fitzpatrick actually had to write that is proof to the contrary. If your geek cred were secure, either in the community itself or within one’s own head, you would never need to defend it.

The dreaded “Fake Geek Girl” title was basically created as a way to undermine a woman’s confidence in her interests and exclude her from the geek community

No, the title followed actual women faking interest in geek culture because it had become popular or to get attention from male geeks these women thought were desperate for female companionship. Every community has posers. That the geek community specifically names each type of poser is not proof of sexism. It is proof of their inherent need to group things.

(although why guys would want to exclude a bunch of awesome girls who can talk about Star Wars and Cowboy BeBop is beyond me).

That is because it does not happen.

Repeat after me, universe: There is no such thing as a fake geek girl.

If you say it three times while looking in a mirror, you actually become a fan girl.

If I consider myself a geek, I don’t have to prove my credentials to you. Just because I don’t game or only watch the Lord of the Rings movies doesn’t give you the right to decide that I’m not a “real” member of your community or that I’m some kind of impostor who pretends to be nerdy to get men to like me.

Actually, it does. A community gets to police itself and decide which people get to belong to it. If you choose to claim membership to a group, you should know what the group thinks you needs to do to belong to it.

In this instance, the argument is significantly more moronic. To say you are a geek because you like one film is akin to calling yourself polymath because you know a lot about one subject. If you like Lord of the Rings, you are a LoRT fan. That does not make you a fan of fantasy or film in general.

This is not to say that people who call themselves geeks have to do everything associated with the community. The simple criteria here is that you like more than one thing, preferably things that are not always part of pop culture.

Of course, no feminist article would be complete without the author playing the victim:

Because Together, We Can Stand Up to the Men Who Still Insist On Harassing Us

Whether you’re a lady gamer, a cosplayer, or just a normal nerdy girl, some guys just don’t get that we don’t like when people are creepy and/or rude to us. Similar to the issue of the “Fake Geek Girl,” some guys seem to feel like geek culture is a man’s space, and that us womenfolk are invading it.

Fitzpatrick again provides the common feminist refrain without any supporting evidence. It is as if it never occurs to feminists that perhaps it is not the men being the assholes. For example:

So, they attempt to eliminate the problem by making that space unsafe for us. If I’m in costume (regardless of if you consider it revealing or not), that’s not an invitation to touch me, take my picture, or make me feel generally uncomfortable.

Last year, my godson went to C2E2 dressed up as Byakuya Kuchiki from Bleach. Numerous people came up to him, touched him, and took his picture. He did feel uncomfortable, but not because people came up to him. He expected that. That was partly why he dressed up. He simply was not prepared for the amount of attention he got. He could not take more than a few steps without people asking for a picture. He did not, however, feel harassed because of it. And the solution was obvious. The next day, he dressed normally and was able to shop around without anyone saying anything to him. He was 14-years-old at the time and figured this out, yet it escapes the average feminist.

If I’m a gamer, that’s not an invitation to make derogatory remarks, sexually harass me, or invite others to harass me.

Trash talking is part of the gaming community. Everyone gets it. If you do not want to it directed at you, then do not play online with people you do not know.

Basically, geeky girls just want to be treated with respect, like any other human being. Not so hard, right?

Apparently it is because whenever geeks treat women the way they treat other human beings, feminists complain. It seems that feminists do not want to be treated like any other human being. They want to be treated like special snowflake princesses. They are welcome to have that as long as they understand that they cannot be “special” and down to earth like everyone else at the same time.

The geek community is like tackle football. If you do not want to be tackled, do not play. We are not changing the rules for you without a very good reason, and your whiny, misandrous politics simply are not good enough.

If you want a safe space where you can play the victim and make everything about you, create your own space.

Stay out of ours.

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17 thoughts on “This is why we can’t have nice things

  1. Funny how she complains about “geeks keeping women out”. I”m a tabletop RPG aficionado, and I see forum thread after forum thread asking where are the women playing tabletop RPGs, how to get more women to play tabletop RPGs, and so on. But yeah, marginalized groups hate poseurs with a passion.

  2. “The geek community is like tackle football. If you do not want to be tackled, do not play. We are not changing the rules for you without a very good reason”

    The problem with this line of reasoning is that feminists have bullied everyone else into changing the rules.By screeching “misogyny” they have made everyone bow to their demands. Feminists have invaded evry male space claiming that women should be permitted to be part of the group. But they don’t want mere admittance, they want the group to change. They are like the Borg, “resistance is futile. You WILL be assimilated.” Your game of tackle football will be turned into flag football before finally being reduced to a huddle where no one knows what a football is for.

  3. Kicking the patriarchy’s butt? Or kissing it? Because feminists often seem to be flexible enough to bounce between being some sort of nemesis to this patriarchy malarkey one minute, and turn into its simpering lapdogs the next.

  4. James, that depends on whether they’re in the presence of a sexually attractive man.

  5. Your game of tackle football will be turned into flag football before finally being reduced to a huddle where no one knows what a football is for.

    TDOM, Gamergate proved that does not have to be the case. If people stand their ground and defend themselves and their community, this tactic does not work.

  6. Quite right, Dave. Hugo schwyzer was a rather choice example.
    But backing up my point are the derogatory attitudes towards prostitutes – any woman controlling patriarchy with half a brain would prevent prostitution as part of their efforts to control female sexuality, yet the feminists serve that very cause well. And at the same time, as far as I know, prostitutes are far more afraid of the police than their clients.

  7. “Fitzpatrick’s comment reveals the real issue feminists have with the geek community: it is not built for them. Of course, this cannot stand. ”

    I have a name for this. I call it “gynoforming” – making the world over to suit their ladylike preferences.

    “If I consider myself a geek, I don’t have to prove my credentials to you. Just because I don’t game or only watch the Lord of the Rings movies doesn’t give you the right to decide that I’m not a “real” member of your community or that I’m some kind of impostor who pretends to be nerdy to get men to like me.”

    Oh the irony – this is exactly what female feminists insist they have the right to do with male feminists.

    “Basically, geeky girls just want to be treated with respect, like any other human being. Not so hard, right?”

    Code for “Treat me like a fragile, dainty little lady, not a gamer.”

    Dave,
    “James, that depends on whether they’re in the presence of a sexually attractive man.”

    That or they want to leverage the power of men against some target they have identified.

  8. “Gynoforming” I like it.

    “Oh the irony – this is exactly what female feminists insist they have the right to do with male feminists.”

    All feminists, from what I’ve seen.

  9. So when people try to talk about men’s issues in feminism or to feminists, they’re often accused of “derailing” trying to make it “all about the menz”. But geeks are apparently under some obligation to make their culture all about women.

    Uh…huh.

    just think of the Big Bang Theory guys who hide behind their comic books and hyperventilate when they have to talk to women.

    You mean that show whose primary cast is three women and four men, and has been for several years? Also, only one of the guys on that show has real anxiety talking to women, and I’m pretty sure he’s been over that for years too. Howard Wolowitz was kind of a skeeve, and he’s currently married, Leonard does okay with girls, and even Sheldon Cooper, who is easily the most stereotypically geeky and asocial dude in of the main cast, has a girlfriend.

    But please, continue to demonstrate your knowledge of geek culture by reducing it to stereotypes that aren’t even true.

    Maggs points out that, statistically, the gaming community is 36 percent women ages 18 and up,

    There has been some questioning of those sorts of statistics, especially since it’s suspected to inflate the numbers by including casual mobile and Facebook gamers. You know, the folks who wouldn’t actually call themselves “gamers”.

    It’s also interesting how the gaming community becomes “male-dominated” whenever convenient for an argument, despite women supposedly representing such a large minority.

    “Fake Geek Girl”

    Ah, yes, that thing that no feminist has ever proven is a significant meme in the geek community. In fact, I’m pretty sure I’ve seen more feminists complaining about it than actual non-feminist geeks.

    In this instance, the argument is significantly more moronic. To say you are a geek because you like one film is akin to calling yourself polymath because you know a lot about one subject. If you like Lord of the Rings, you are a LoRT fan. That does not make you a fan of fantasy or film in general.

    There was a storyline in Foxtrot about how, I gathered, teenage girl Paige was interested in the LOTR films because Orlando Bloom, in contrast to her proud geek younger brother, who just liked the franchise.

    Because Together, We Can Stand Up to the Men Who Still Insist On Harassing Us

    The requisite self-martyrdom that also ignores the existence of male feminists because they’re inconvenient to the threat narrative.

    The funny thing is that when female MRA Typhonblue disagreed politely with feminists having a panel, with their permission, both she and her entire group got kicked out of the con. They even called the cops on them because they were, gasp, meeting in a nearby park. But I don’t see very many feminists defending them.

  10. The funny thing is that when female MRA Typhonblue disagreed politely with feminists having a panel, with their permission, both she and her entire group got kicked out of the con.

    One of the accusations against the HoneyBadgers were that they were fake nerds – that they were seeking to gain attendance under false pretenses. This came from completely missing the irony in the HoneyBadger’s description where they wrote:

    We plan to infiltrate nerd culture cunningly disguised as their own. Each of us has been carefully crafting a persona of nerdiness through decades of dedication to comics, science fiction, fantasy, comedy games and other geekery, waiting for this moment, our moment to slip among the unaware. Once there we will start distributing the totalitarian message that nerd and gamer culture is… perfectly wonderful just as it is and should be left alone to go it’s own way.

  11. Tamen, I continue to find that assuming. The feminists who attacked the Badgers love using “ironic misandry.” One would think that they would recognize similar irony, yet in this instance they took it completely seriously, as if someone would truly spend decades crafting a false persona just to fit into a group. Where would they get that idea?

    Oh. Never mind.

  12. this girl’s entitlement drives me nuts!

    “If I’m in costume (regardless of if you consider it revealing or not), that’s not an invitation to touch me, take my picture,” it most certainly is an invitation to take your picture. if you don’t want to be photographed, don’t go in costume, or stay home. these silly fake geek girls think they can re-write well established photography laws. and nobody is touching them. there are so many pictures of hover-hand, it’s a joke.

    then she goes on to quote the video game woozle & talks about doctor who, sherlock & slash fan-fiction. if ever there were a litmus test for fake geek girls, she passed it.

  13. We’re occasionally (or, sadly, not so occasionally) made to feel uncomfortable about expressing our love for all things nerdy, and an apparent lack of a safe space within the community can turn a lot of would-be fangirls off. And that means fewer Harry/Draco slash fanfic and Han Solo memes, which I am just not OK with.

    Could you imagine if some group of men, perhaps one claiming to agitate for men’s rights, entered a primarily female fandom space and one of their main contributions to that fandom was taking canonically straight and not particularly sexualised female characters and writing lesbian slash fiction about them for each others’ and their own sexual gratification? I imagine that would be some sort of high misogyny, and those men would be “made to feel uncomfortable” for doing that in very short order, possibly with thrown rocks.

    My point is, if through your own admission one of the main contributions of women (or rather, the ones in your camp) in this community they’re trying to get into is homoerotic slash fiction of beloved non-gay, non-erotic characters, then no wonder you’re made to feel uncomfortable and unwelcome. Some of these things you are doing are making the existing mostly male fanbase uncomfortable, and because of this you are unwelcome.

  14. Pingback: Top Posts of 2015 | Toy Soldiers

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