I thought I would share Matthew Santoro’s video about his abuse at the hands of an ex-girlfriend. It takes Santoro some time before he is able to describe what happened to him. I have seen that before with many abused men. They are not used to talking about it, and quite often all the emotions rush forward at once.
The video has made the rounds on the internet, and I hope that more comes from it than people merely listening to him speak and saying how sorry they feel for him. People should listen to what he says about how this woman abused him. Listen to the ways in which his abuser worked. Listen to how she manipulated him and others. Listen to how she used the situation and her sex to her advantage.
These are things that male victims face. These are the things that keep many men from coming forward. Part of what makes Santoro’s story so powerful is that you can see his face. You can see the affect the abuse had on him. The visual makes it harder to dismiss him.
We need to understand that domestic violence is not about male oppression of females, but about one person controlling another. It knows no sex. It is purely about power through fear.
Please take the time to listen to Santoro’s story.