Support the Canadian Centre for Men and Families

The Canadian Centre of Men and Families is marking their first-year anniversary. The organization provides support for men, their families, and male victims of abuse. The organization is engaged in several operations, including creating a shelter male victims of domestic violence and fighting an anti-male policy on a college that blocks the creation of a support group for men.

They created a video discussing these topics and sharing some of the stories of the men they helped. They are looking for donations, and any donations they receive before December 31st will be matched another donor. From the YouTube page:

Please Give Generously to http://equalitycanada.com/donation/

CAFE and the CCMF need your support to continue this important mission. All donations made on or before December 31st 2015 will be DOUBLED. Monthly donations are highly appreciated.

This type of service is desperately needed in Canada. There are so few services for men and a great deal of opposition to creating them. Any support you can offer will help the organization continue its work in supporting men and boys. Continue reading

Two interviews with Christiana Hoff Sommers

I recently watched two interviews of Christiana Hoff Sommers. The first was on The Joe Rogan Experience. The second was on The Rubin Report. Apparently Sommers gave the interviews a short time apart. That is impressive because the Rogan interview is almost three hours long.

Both interviews cover much of the same topics — feminism, progressive tactics, the pushing of feminist narratives, misandry, etc. The Rubin Report is more focused while the The Rogan Experience is a casual conversation. Both are worth watching. Continue reading

Silent Suffering: Supporting the Male Survivors of Sexual Assault

The Greater London Authority (GLA) Conservative London commissioned a study on male victims of sexual violence. The study collected the reporting rate of male victims to local police. The results showed a stark situation:

On Wednesday, the GLA Conservative Group issued a thorough study that highlighted the gulf between adult male sexual assaults and the amount that get reported to the police.

Titled “Silent Suffering – Supporting the Male Survivors of Sexual Assault”, the paper highlighted the fact that between 2010 and 2014 there were 26,483 recorded incidents of males being victims of sexual assault or rape. This is contrasted with research conducted by SurvivorsUK, the largest and longest established specialist male sexual violence support charity in the UK, which evaluated five years of self-referral data (more than 600 individual entries) to establish that less than 4pc of the sample had reported their experience of adult sexual assault to the police.

The study provided an estimated numbers of victims:

Figures collected from all the UK’s police forces show that between 2010 and 2014 there were 26,483 recorded incidents of males being victims of sexual assault or rape.

This includes 3,748 incidents recorded by the Metropolitan Police Service (MPS) – the highest rate in the UK.

Using these figures alongside the research conducted by SurvivorsUK, we can estimate the number of males over the age of 16 who were sexually assaulted or raped between 2010 and 2014, who did not report their experiences to the police.

These numbers suggest that across the entire UK between 2010 and 2014, 679,051 sexual assaults and rapes of males took place. Of these – 652,568 were not reported to any police force.

In the geographical area covered by the MPS this would equate to 96,103 sexual assaults and rapes of males between 2010 and 2014 – with 92,355 of them not being reported.

The study also analyzed why men do not come forward. Continue reading

Men’s Mental Health

The Honey Badgers hosted a podcast discussion about men’s health several days ago. The show stemmed from an email the Badgers received from a man who feels disconnected because he has trouble making friends. He is a “straight-acting” gay man, and found that other gay men want little to do with him because he doesn’t share their interests and straight men want little to do with him once they find out he is gay.

Allison asked the listeners if any would be interested in supporting him. The outpouring was high, and the Men’s Mental Health show features some of those emails as well as other men sharing their stories of isolation. Continue reading

Millions of men have ‘no close friends’

In light of International Men’s Day, I wanted to talk about male friendship. I found an article about a survey about the topic. The Movember Foundation released a survey which found that more than 2.5 million British men have no close friends:

Stoicism and isolation make lonely mates of too many men.

New research by the Movember Foundation reveals that a devastating number of men feel friendless.

The survey found that 51 per cent of respondents – the equivalent of about two and a half million British men – have no close friends.

Being married or middle-aged significantly increases the likelihood that men have no one (apart from their partner, if they are married) they feel they can turn to in a crisis.

I do not agree with the author’s premise that stoicism leads to loneliness. Controlling one’s emotions has little to do with making friends.

I do think that our society’s continued mockery of masculinity and male bonding, as well as the unbalanced focus on women’s needs, can lead to a profound loneliness. We teach boys that turning to other males for their emotional needs is either bad or “gay.” We then force them to place all their emotional dependence on their wife or girlfriend, despite that half of these relationships will end.  Continue reading

The Honey Badgers discuss male suicide

A few days ago the Honey Badgers invited Tom Golden, a psychotherapist and the author of Swallowed by a Snake, on their show to discuss men’s health.

I think this is one of the best shows the Badgers have done. It is an excellent discussion about how men deal with emotional pain, what men learn about how people will treat them if they show pain, and the lack of support for suffering men.

I like that they do not skirt around the issues, especially the idea of there being one “right” way of healing. It is very common for people to tell wounded men that they need to talk about it. Many people fail to realize that this often is not how men cope with their pain or how they show their emotions. Men tend to be doers, so one may see a man make something or do something as a means of dealing with grief or hurt rather than sit down and cry it out.

The two parts that stood out for me was Brian talking about his father’s current health condition and Rachel speaking about a former boyfriend who broke down in front of her. These two stories show the types of things men go through, and ultimately shatter the narrative that men have it easier.

This is definitely an episode of Honey Badger Radio worth a listen: Continue reading

Bulletin Board v269

Breastfeeding mum loses custody of boy after false sex-abuse claims — A mother found to have made false sexual abuse allegations has lost custody of her young son and been hit with a rare order to pay her ex-partner’s full legal costs. In a blistering judgment, Federal Circuit Court judge Josephine Willis said the north Queensland mother “showed ­little emotion or warmth” and communication with her was “quite impossible”.

Children in boot camp abuse investigation suffer lasting damage, lawyer says — The brochure struck a note with some parents: Are you overwhelmed with frustration or fear over your teen’s defiant behavior? Have you run out of ideas or strategies to get your teen on the right track? Have you tried it all and nothing seems to work? The solution, it declared, could be a police-sponsored boot camp for southeast Los Angeles County youth held at a military base in the mountains of San Luis Obispo.

Group supporting male abuse victims launched — MALE victims of domestic abuse have been given a voice, thanks to a new charitable organisation run by an abuse survivor. Swindon’s Voice For Men, run by counsellor Simon Taylor, aims to give abused males a chance to seek help in a non-threatening group environment. Simon, along with partner Su Mills and colleague Michael Bizley launched Swindon VFM this week, complete with website and dedicated listening line in place to help those in need.

Joint Letter Calls for Male Rape Change to Law — Nine Chinese public interest organizations submitted a joint letter on August 5, asking for the inclusion of male rape to the draft ninth amendment of the Criminal Law. The letter, jointly signed by a total of 1,149 people and nine officially approved public interest organizations, was submitted to the Standing Committee of the National People’s Congress, the country’s top legislative body, through the online opinion-soliciting channel, according to ycwb.com, a Guangzhou based news portal on August 7. The letter proposed that the definition of victims of rape should be broadened to include all possible victims.

Male child sex trade goes on unchecked — The male child prostitution is going on in several hotels and inns around Pirwadhai Bus Terminal, well-placed sources disclosed to The Nation on Saturday. In this regard, the Special Branch (SB) of Punjab Police has prepared a number of reports and sent to Inspector General of Police (IGP) Mushtaq Ahmed Sukhera for further legal action against the owners of the hotels and inns involved in the child prostitution business, sources said.

Prosecutor: Federal Way woman made child porn ‘to troll for men online’ — A Federal Way woman accused of sexually displaying two children to impress a men online has been charged by King County prosecutors. Judith Christine Everett is alleged to have taken sexually explicit photos of a 13-year-old girl and a 9-year-old boy. Everett, 39, has been charged with sexual exploitation of a minor. Writing the court, Senior Deputy Prosecutor Cecelia Gregson said Everett abused the children “to troll for men online.”

Scotch College: More sex abuse claims surface against Michael Achurch — Matthew Stuart still feels the pain of being denied justice for more than three decades. Even after Melbourne’s Scotch College apologised and paid out compensation for the sexual abuse he suffered as a teenager, the elite school community was still denying it happened and questioning his motivations, he said. But the 51-year-old’s bravery in speaking out about Michael Achurch, as revealed in The Age earlier this year, has prompted at least four others to report being sexually abused by the same teacher.

Sex abuse victim fears others could have been targeted by former teacher and hopes they come forward — A SEXUAL abuse victim has spoken of his relief that the former volunteer teacher who abused him is behind bars. But the man who suffered at the hands of John Weston is concerned there could be more victims and is urging them to come forward. He told the Bristol Post: “I am one of this man’s victims, hence my need to remain anonymous.

Suicide Rates Among Released Male Prisoners 8 Times Higher Than National Average; Mental Health, Support Services Can Help — Preventing suicides while offenders are in prison has been a much bigger priority than preventing them once prisoners get out. But a new study looking into prisoner suicides once they’re released has found that the risk of suicide for male offenders is eight times the national average, with over 25 percent of those suicides occurring in the first four weeks of their release.