A Dose of Stupid v109

It happens every day. In fact, it is pretty hard to avoid it. There are some things that can only be understood with a slap on the forehead. Things so mind-boggling that one wonders how humans managed to evolve thumbs while being this mentally inept. Case in point:

Feminists ask conference attendees to use “jazz hands” because clapping triggers anxiety

I consider this to be yet another example of feminists’ continued effort to ironically undermine their own goals by proving their immaturity. Here is the explanation for this stupidity:

The National Union of Students (NUS) Women’s Campaign announced the clapping “ban” at the West Midlands conference on Twitter Tuesday, shortly after receiving a request from the Oxford University Women’s Campaign.

“@nuswomcam please can we ask people to stop clapping but do feminist jazz hands? it’s triggering some peoples’ anxiety. thank you!” Oxford representatives wrote.

Within five minutes, NUS tweeted: “Some delegates are requesting that we move to jazz hands rather than clapping, as it’s triggering anxiety. Please be mindful! #nuswomen15.”

I am curious: how are “feminist” jazz hands different the the typical ones? Do the feminist jazz hands have vaginas in the palms à la Vampire Hunter D? ( I am just asking questions.)

Setting that aside, let us find out how clapping is triggering.

Delegates told BBC’s Newsbeat that jazz hands are “a nice way to show solidarity.”

“Jazz hands are used throughout NUS in place of clapping as a way to show appreciation of someone’s point without interrupting or causing disturbance, as it can create anxiety,” said Nona Buckley-Irvine, general secretary at the London School of Economics Students’ Union. “I’m relatively new to this and it did feel odd at first, but once you’ve used jazz hands a couple of times it becomes a genuinely nice way to show solidarity with a point and it does add to creating a more inclusive atmosphere.”

Of course. Because rather than this:

Feminists would prefer this:

That is clearly the least distracting of the two.

Granted, that does not factor in the people who cannot lift their hands or do not have hands. They will not be able to clap or use jazz hands. It also does not factor the seeing impaired. As acute as their hearing may be, it is not likely they will hear the light pitter-patter of fingers flailing in the air quite as well as they would applause. How ableist of feminists to exclude disabled people.

It also does not factor in all the people who need claps to survive, like Tinker Bell.

You can hear feminists, cannot you? Peter Pan pleads to them, “Oh please, please believe! If you believe, where ever you are, clap your hands and Tink’ll hear you. Clap.”

Feminists says, “No.”

“Clap your hands.”

“No.”

“Don’t let Tink die!”

“No. I’m going to give her… JAZZ HANDS!”

Now Pan sits there with his dead fairy because feminists would not put their hands together because the sound of slapping skin makes them anxious. (There are several other jokes here, but I will let them pass.)

So here is what I want readers to do: when you see a feminist, clap your hands. Clap will all your heart. Clap like you mean it. Do it just to see if feminists do this:

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10 thoughts on “A Dose of Stupid v109

  1. Sometimes I think there is no point in opposing feminism since it seems determined to destroy itself. How much longer can a movement like this be taken seriously by any noticeable segment of the populace?

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